its 3:00 am and im sitting here in solitude, staring out my dirty window as the rain falls. what is the point of life? why even be alive when you are so sad all the time. mom sent me to a pshchologist today. god she is always bitching at me, just because i wear girls pants and kiss boys doesnt mean im gay. i can be whoever i want to be, stop trying to control me. she just doesnt understand how deep adn complicated i am. no one understands, except me. sarah understood me, but now that were not together anymore i dont have anyone to talk to, it feels like she ripped my heart out. im gonna go cut myself.